Here are five basic guidelines to create a safe space.
To create a safe space for difficult conversations where people can express themselves openly and respectfully with the intent to learn and reduce their own biases is a sensitive but important task.
We use these at Hello Human Connect events to create safe spaces for deep conversations with Responsible Empathy and Mindful Dialogue:
1. Active Listening:
- Listen attentively: Be present. Give your full attention to the speaker, maintain eye contact, and avoid interrupting.
- Paraphrase and reflect to clarify: Restate the speaker’s main points to ensure understanding and avoid misunderstandings.
- Validate feelings: Acknowledge the speaker’s emotions without judgment.
- Ask open-ended questions: Encourage deeper discussion and self-reflection.
2. Speak with Respect:
- Use “I” statements: Frame your thoughts and feelings in a way that avoids blaming and accusatory language.
- Focus on the issue, not the person: Address the specific behavior or belief, not the individual.
- Avoid generalizations: Use specific examples to illustrate your points rather than broad, negative statements.
- Choose your words carefully: Be mindful of the impact of your language and avoid hurtful or offensive language.
3. Practice Empathy:
- Try to understand the other person’s perspective: Imagine yourself in their perspective and consider their feelings and motivations.
- Show compassion: Be kind and understanding, even when you disagree.
- Validate their feelings: Acknowledge their emotions and show compassion.
- Avoid defensiveness: Listen to feedback with an open mind and be willing to learn. Listen actively and seek to understand before responding.
- Ask clarifying questions: Seek further information to deepen comprehension.
4. Take Responsibility for Your Own Emotions:
- Recognize your triggers: Identify what makes you emotional and develop strategies to manage them.
- Take a break if needed: If you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed, excuse yourself and take a moment to calm down.
- Communicate your needs: Let others know if you need space or support or if something is triggering you.
5. Respect Differences and Boundaries:
- Acknowledge diverse viewpoints: Understand that people have different opinions, beliefs, viewpoints and experiences.
- Avoid judgment: Respect others, even if you disagree with them.
- Seek common ground: Focus on shared values and goals and the intent to unify as an outcome.
- Avoid personal attacks: Focus on the issue at hand, not the person.
By following these five guidelines, you can begin to create a safe space and supportive environment where people can have open and honest conversations.
Whether you are wondering how to create a safe space for your group, for your partner or for discussion with someone, these are a good place to start. This list can be enhanced further so feel free to add other well meaning actions to your own list.